We're underway at Bryant-Denny Stadium! Razorbacks have the ball first. Lets see what happens.
15:00- Brandon Allen delivers a dart to the middle of the field for a 15 yard gain! Couldn't have asked for a better first play.
13:12- Alabama has some big Ole boys on their front line. 3rd down for the hogs is broken up and we have to punt.
9:00- Alabama is blitzkrieging down the field like we're Belgian. Or worse: French. There's our World War II reference of the day.
7:32- Razorbacks force a 3rd down and goal where we stand tall! Our zone defense lets teams waltz down the field, only to hold them to a field goal from the 5 yard line.
7:01- Throw to Morgan, and he gets ROCKED for no gain. We then punt the ball back to the Tide.
4:11- Derrick Henry is plowing through, around, and over our linebackers like he's a Panzer tank. Whoops, there's another one.
2:30- Alabama is driving and just picked up a first down onto our 41 yard line. As much as both teams like to run it, we may at least make the record books for fastest game ever.
End of the first quarter sees Alabama with a second down at the Razorbacks 5. Maybe we can pull off another huge stop. Buuuuuuuuuuuut.
14:51- What is going on here? Two pass attempts by Alabama fall short and they have to kick another field goal!! We're still in this!!
HE MISSES THE KICK!?!?! HE MISSED THE KICK! WOO GOSH DARN PIG!
I'm feeling optimistic right now. As a Hog fan of many years, I know this is not a good thing. I'm going to go watch the scene where Marley dies in Marley and me to bring my emotions back to Earth. (Spoiler alert: Marley dies.)
14:39- Get out the cupcakes and ice cream! 21 yard pass to Jeremy Sprinkle. Hurry up run play to Collins up the middle following the pass for a gain of 1. We're not giving up on the run game, no matter how hopeless.
13:00- 3rd and 8 for the Hogs and Brandon Allen is sacked. Alabama is bringing pressure and Allen and the line just can't handle the heat they're bringing.
11:20- Coker threw the ball up and said "Oh no, this is no good. Big man Saban will not be pleased." Then ITS PICKED OFF. Big man Saban yelled very loud.
10:22- Brandon Allen completes to his top receiver, "Sideline."
9:50- Alabama turns a loss of 4 into a gain of 4. We can't contain. Big 3rd and 12 coming up- which we stand strong on!
9:00- The Hogs have the ball back only down by 3. Somehow. We eventually have to Capitalize On All These Chances.
8:34- We just rushed for over 2 yards. A WHOLE 4!
8:00- The announcers couldn't help themselves and called the solid playing veteran quarterback "Crafty." I did see him in Hobby Lobby once buying wickers baskets for his mom's Silent Auction business. That's a possibly true story.
4:21- Alabama's huge punt return is negated by a block in the back. Thankfully.
2:47- ANOTHER PICK WOO DAMN PIG. I'M TAKING THIS BLOG PG-13 I'm SO EXCITED!!!!!
1:29- We just took the lead. It's 7-3. Hold me back. I'mma about to liftoff off this couch.
I just lifted off and got some snacks. I'm breaking my diet that's how excited I am.
1:18- Hogs defense is giving the Tide an 8 yard cushion as they have to drive 50 yards in under a minute.
0:12- Alabama's last ditch effort to get into field goal range is aided by a holding on the Hogs. The tide have a solid chance at a long field goal now.
0:00- The 45 yard field goal is no good, and we're leading.
Somehow. Some way. The Arkansas Razorbacks are more than doubling the Alabama Crimson Tide at Halftime.
We're the ragtag patriots fighting the red coats.
The walk ons beating out the starters.
The Chess Team president dating the Colors Day Queen.
WE'RE DOING IT GUYS!!!!
13:17- We're underway in the 3rd quarter and the Razorbacks forced a very quick 4 and out! Alabama punts!
13:04- Arkansas roughs the kicker. This can't be real life.
Wait. The previous play is under further review. Everyone psychic please say the proper incantation to influence the mind of the Referee through the TV. I saw it on Fox News once. Call reversed! Woo pig!
12:08- Alex Collins is doing his best tree impersonation and falling forward. Love that guy.
11:31- The pass to Sprinkle was deflected by his arch rival, Cookie.
11:24- Arkansas Defense is beating up Coke-er like Pepsi is paying them. Alabama forced to punt!
9:07- Brandon Allen scrambles for a first down and then fumbles! Mom, if you're reading this, I need new heart medication. Also shoutout to Obama for letting me stay on your health insurance. Ruled a Fourth down. We can't eve.
8:25- We're going for it on Fourth! Or maybe that's what we want you to think. We're punting on 4th and 6.
7:06- Alabama's drive falters and we get the ball back.
4:57- 2nd & 15 for the Hogs. Otherwise known as "Worse for your heart than a Hardee's ThickBurger."
3:45- Brandon Allen is a proponent of 2nd amendment rights evidently. He fires a BULLET for a 15 yard gain, and a FIRST DOWN.
2:46- The Crimson Tide is turning into a Crimson wave pool.
1:56- I apologize to all Hog fans for that previous post as they then forced a 4th down with a dominant defensive push.
1:39- FORGIVE ME. 81 yard pass play leads to an Alabama score. Say it ain't so, Joe.
0:40- We faked it. We faked a punt and couldn't get it. Don't let us lose like this.
The 3rd quarter comes to an end as Alabama gets the ball at our 45. This looks like another heartbreak ending.
Welcome to the 4th Quarter, where legends are made- and ill advised bets are lost. Arkansas is down 10-7 and Alabama has the ball in Razorback territory. Let's see how this plays out.
15:00- SAAAAAAAAAABBBBAAAAAANNNNNNNNN sounds a lot like you're screaming "Satan." Try it out.
14:49- Defensive holding penalty advances Bama even further into Razorback territory, and even with their kicker- they should get out of here with a field goal.
12:49- As Chinua Achebe famously opined in his magnum opus, "Things Fall Apart" Alabama gets a slant route pass into the endzone. Alas, poor Yorik. AKA Hog hopes and dreams.
8:34- So done with this game.
Nick Saban listens to Gangnam style and Pitbull daily.